Wednesday, June 22, 2005

Some Short Poems

On Your Birthday

On your birthday
I wish you sincerely
Not just cursorily
A very happy
Full of mirth day
A very smurfy
Blue faced smurf day
A going out for
Surf-n-turf day
A making out like
Murph the Surf day
A wow you gotta
Lotta nerve day
A drive to the hoop
Get on your swerve day
And if last year
It was a smirched day
This year twill be
Reverse the curse day


Armenians Are Sweet

Armenians are sweet,
Full of phyllo, nuts and honey;
They like to buy some pabklava
When they get a little money.


Tina Marie

Volupshus, Volupshus Tina Marie!
No! Tina Marie! Don't sit on my knee!
I got an old football injury.
Now it's gonna need surgery.


A Few Words About Credit Rates

(to the tune of Good King Wenceslas)

Retail stores throw wide their doors,
Their rates just short of stealing.
Interest rates are going up,
Going through the ceiling.
Credit cards will cost you more
Than if you paid at the store.
You'll lose an unholy war
If you use your sto-o-ore card.

[December, 2004]


Mrs. Noonan

Mrs. Noonan, soccer mom and "communist,"
Freckled, red-haired, smiling friend to man,
Sweet, hazel eyed, 2nd trombonist, harmonist,
And, at night, old lucky Noonan's concubine.


Alfred Earl Tennisknickers

Alfred Earl Tennisknickers
In rolled-up white flannels
(He also wore flannels in bed)
Was out on the lawns.
He was sprinting about,
Striking an attitude,
Missing the ball.


Valentines For A New Age

Would you, my sweet, agree to be
My Monica Lewinsky?

Sorry, that I cannot be,
But I can be your Hillary.

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