MICHAEL DENNIS MOONEY -- new writings

Ah heah how you gots one dem whaddycalls-its.
You knows, wheah dey jams da whole message in, in a few woids...

Hey, Ah heahs youse more busier den a one ahm paypuh-hanguh
Wid da prickly rash. Ya doan have time to antsa no phone!...

So peoples dey gotta send da message wid text
So you can READ da phone youse 'salready yappin on...

Sorta takes da joy outta it, 'swhat Ahm talkin bout, whadda youse tinkin?!
Dis idda phone yer already yappin on, already readin on, already messaging on...

Also already takin voicemails on, like twenty of em or more,
Deys stacked up like da jets hovering or La Guardia...

An dis is why peoples gotta WRITE to ya on yuh phone!
'Cept you gotta tell em, Domebeezetoopid and write a book...

Hey, doan write no Great American Novel, willya,
Ya Gavoone! Hey Ahm onna phone ovah heah!...

Den dey gotta write brief-like, hafta send dem tweeps,
'Slike em olefashioned tellhergrams. I sent dese heah to yo Bum Berry...

'Cuz ya still a Bum. ~ Ahm still ...Yer Brutha, Mikey...
('Course I doan do brief, eggsackly, so, me, Ah send you nine.)



[Notes on Common Slurvian Words: heah=hear, dey=they, youse=you is, you are, or yours, Ah=I,
paypuh=paper, doan=don't, antsa=answer, tinkin=thinkin, Domebeezetoopid=Don't be stupid,
Wheah=where, Ahm=I'm or arm, idda=is the, dese heah=these here, onna=on the, tweeps=tweets,
and tweets can be choips, twoips, tweeps, twerps, twips, twits, eggcetra.]