Thursday, July 29, 2010

The Comparison

Shall I compare her to winter in Alaska?
What could be more an idyll? Now I ask ya!
She's bracing, like that truck stop in Wasilla
That has such great hot coffee! Killer!
At that depot, along the commercial strip,
Everything tells you, Wasilla's worth the trip.
Come by dogsled, snowmobile, or Piper Cub,
By semi, tractor, or by Russian sub,
And see Wasilla is like her beauty!
We come to praise her, as is our duty.

She is like unto a sunlit glare on icy highway,
Brilliantly impactful, and not in a shy way.
She stimulates, ah, like the smell of diesels,
Perfume to Northern painters at their easels.
Her smile is very like that billboard!
Oversized enough to drive you off the road.
So spellbinding are her powers of speech,
Hairs do stand, as at a truck's hydraulic screech.
And she is, as yon pipeline, conduit of crude,
A link, a rusted one, to all our gross ineptitude.

Recently, former Governor of Alaska and former Mayor of Wasilla, Sarah Palin, compared herself to Shakespeare. Yup! This came up when reporters criticized her for using the non-word, "refudiate." (AP's "word of the year for 2010," it has sparked the most googling.) Quote: "English is a living language. Shakespeare liked to coin new words, too." Okay, Gov, we misunderestimated your linguisticacious-type persipacuity.

This verse appeared as a comment in the NYTIMES.COM weblog, The Caucus, for its post of July 18, 2010, "Palin, Shakespeare, And The Ground Zero Mosque."

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