MICHAEL DENNIS MOONEY -- new writings

An anti-bibliography of the modern novel
by Michael Dennis Mooney

THE RICH ARE DIFFERENT FROM YOU AND ME
(Fitzgerald's A Diamond As Big As The Ritz)

LIL GAY GUYS WID FURRY FEET
(Tolkein's The Hobbit)

BALONEY'S COMIN THROUGH THE DELI RYE
(Salinger's Catcher In The Rye)

RABBIT REMAINDERED
(Updike's Rabbit Redux)

HIPPIES VS. HUBERT HUMPHREY
(Mailer's Miami And The Siege of Chicago)

WATCHING THE TEST PATTERN
(Kosinski's Being There)

THE SOUND OF ONE HAND WANKING
(Roth's Portnoy's Complaint)

I STILL DON'T HAVE HEALTH CARE
(Faulkner's As I Lay Dying)

IT'S ONLY THE ITALIAN ARMY
(Hemingway's A Farewell To Arms)

A HAS-BEEN HAS A HEART ATTACK
(in an elevator, while taking out the garbage)
(Bellow's Humboldt's Gift)

I CAME OUT AT SING SING
(Cheever's Falconer)

IT AIN'T EASY BEIN A MONSTA
(Gardner's Grendel)

OH! GILES! YOU'RE AN ANIMAL!
(Barth's Giles Goat-Boy)

And here's some that don't come from me:

COME BACK TO THE RAFT, HUCK HONEY!
from Critic Leslie Fiedler's re-title for Clemens' Huckleberry Finn

WHAT TO DO ' TIL THE DOCTOR COMES
from Barth's original title for his End Of The Road

RED BAG OF GARBAGE
(from Mad's spoof on Crane's eternal book report topic,
Red Badge of Courage)

NOTES:
- Roth's writing has often been about sex-frustration, the difference between
pursuing desire and being content with life as it is.
- Hemingway's character said, "I feel terrible, I'm deserting the army."
His girlfriend replied, "Don't be ridiculous. It's only the Italian Army."
- Bellow's Humboldt was the failed writer Delmore Schwartz, who died
paranoid, penniless, and unemployed in a Times Square hotel (while
bringing the garbage down.)
-Falconer basically revealed Cheever's interest in depicting his own
homosexual experiences. The novel was a depiction of a man, sentenced to Sing-Sing
for killing his brother, who had intense sexual experiences in prison.
- Gardner re-told the Beowulf saga from the point of view of the
monster, Grendel.
- Barth's original title, What To Do, etc., was rejected by his editor,
who suggested End Of The Road. (Barth would be delighted to have his book re-titled.)
- Goat-Boy was raised by goats (allegory) and then becomes human, but
never can forget he's an animal.
- Feidler was lampooning the fawning language of Jim, the runaway slave,
in the Samuel Clemens book.

FOR MORE RE-TITLES, See Dan Wilbur's Site: [http://betterbooktitles.com/]